Image by mohamed_hassan from Pixabay
Sometimes we enter relationships and have bad toxic habits that we think are normal when they’re not. Habits that are more than likely normalized by the new generations. I’m here to tell you about them and why they are unhealthy. I am guilty of some of these habits so we’re learning better habits together. Which is all the personal growth journey is about.
Table of contents
- 1) Blowing someone’s cell phone up
- 2) Calling them out of their name
- 3) Blocking/Unblocking
- 4) Bringing out the worst in you
- 5) Cheating
- 6) Gaslighting
- 7) No respect for boundaries
- 8) Not Defining the Relationship
- 9) Inconsistency
- 10) Ghosting during difficult times
- 11) Policing One’s Character
- 12) Entitlement
- 13) Not communicating one’s feelings
1) Blowing someone’s cell phone up
It can be easy to get caught up in your emotions when you’re upset or sad, or when you want to talk to someone. Constantly calling and texting someone when you want to speak to them and they’re not answering is inappropriate. If they don’t answer the phone the first time, give them time to return the call. It shows a lack of respect and boundaries. Unless something is wrong and it’s an emergency, then the person might really have a life and is busy. On top of all that, it can come off a bit crazy.
2) Calling them out of their name
Your partner calling you out of your name is one of the biggest signs of disrespect. Vulgarity in general shouldn’t be used to get a point across. It’s disrespectful and is completely out of line. If it’s not your name, a term of endearment, or a puppy name then it should not fly.
3) Blocking/Unblocking
The entire point of blocking someone is so that the person has no way to contact you. Intentionally blocking someone to make them upset is childlike behavior. Blocking and unblocking someone is not a healthy way to communicate when issues arise. If anything, it always makes the situation worse. If you really need to block someone, please do it logically and keep them blocked.
4) Bringing out the worst in you
When you start doing things you wouldn’t normally do, it’s not a healthy situation. Let’s use revenge cheating as an example. If you’re the type of person who is totally against cheating, and you find yourself cheating just to get back at your partner. next thing you know, you’ve backtracked on your morals. This leads me to my next toxic relationship habit…
5) Cheating
We all know that cheating is one of the most terrible acts you can commit, and there isn’t much left that needs to be said about it. Cheating will not only destroy the relationship, but it also destroys trust, character, self-esteem, and sense of self-worth. It shows lack of morals and self-control.
6) Gaslighting
According to Psychology Today, gaslighting is a form of manipulation and psychological control. Victims of gaslighting are deliberately and systematically fed false information that leads them to question what they know to be true, often about themselves. When someone is doing this to you, nine times out of ten, they won’t change. Leave.
7) No respect for boundaries
When you have rules set for yourself and your partner does not respect your limitations or violates them then they simply do not care. You most likely won’t agree on a lot of things, which makes it hard to work with. Don’t ignore the signs. They will also not take you seriously, because you don’t even take your boundaries seriously.
8) Not Defining the Relationship
Don’t ever settle. Once you’ve made it clear you know what you want, stand on it. When someone is hesitant about what their plans are with you, then that should be loud and clear. They may want something, just not with you. Situationships are a complete waste of time and energy and someone always gets hurt in the end.
The only way for a situationship to work out successfully is if both parties agree on it and are aware of what it may come with. If someone is okay with “going with the flow”, there are normally other parts of their lives they have also been “going with the flow” with. There are no clear intentions with you or their life.
9) Inconsistency
If someone is in and out of your life, take that as a sign, and leave them alone. Someone who has genuine intentions and concern for you and your feelings will provide clarity without confusion. It is up to you to decide whether to deal with the inconsistency or not.
10) Ghosting during difficult times
Ghosting someone is one of the most spineless and inconsiderate things you can do. If they don’t care enough to communicate with you, they are a coward. Everyone knows that communication is the key to a healthy relationship. It is immature to leave someone hanging, period. Never take someone ghosting you personally. It has everything to do with how they handle situations, and nothing to do with you.
11) Policing One’s Character
For instance, your boyfriend telling you “Please don’t do ABC, my friends don’t like it when you do that.” is policing your character and is controlling. Controlling what your partner does (or wears), is one toxic habit most people don’t even believe is manipulating.
12) Entitlement
Entitlement is the belief that one is deserving of certain privileges and/or benefits without having to earn them. People who feel entitled tend to lack self-awareness, lack of empathy, a sense of victimhood, or a lack of understanding of privilege; and all of these things are toxic.
13) Not communicating one’s feelings
This is something so many people have a hard time with. Once you open yourself up you may be scared that you’ll be taken advantage of when the truth is, that only happens with the wrong people. With the right person, communication goes a long way. Vulnerability is a characteristic that a true leader carries. Once you’ve mastered it, it’ll take you far. So many things could be fixed with a simple conversation.
Discover more from She Informs
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
One Comment
Pingback: