Are you in some kind of relationship but can’t quite define what it is? From the outside, it may look like a regular relationship, but deep down, you can feel that something is off. You might be in what is known as a “situationship.” If you’re unsure about your situation, keep an eye out for these seven signs you are in a situationship. Hop in! It’s time to gain clarity and find the happiness you deserve.
What is a situationship?
Situationships are a gray area between a casual fling and a committed relationship. They lack a clear definition, commitment, or the security of knowing where you stand. It’s a relationship that lacks a clear label, leaving you unsure if you’re “just friends,” “seeing each other,” or “dating.” Without a defined relationship status, it can be challenging to navigate the emotions and expectations that come with being in a situationship. Which is why I don’t recommend it.
Sign #1: You haven’t defined the relationship
One of the most telling signs that you’re in a situationship is the lack of a defined relationship. You may spend time together, go on dates, and even be intimate, but you haven’t had a conversation about what you both want from the relationship. This lack of clarity can leave you feeling confused and unsure about where you stand with the other person. Without defining the relationship, it’s challenging to set boundaries, establish expectations, and build a solid foundation for the future. It will leave you confused and emotionally drained.
If you’ve defined the relationship, simply have that conversation or move on. Here are some steps you can take:
1. Have an open and honest conversation: Talk to the other person about your feelings, desires, and expectations. Express your desire for a more committed relationship and see if they are on the same page.
2. Set clear boundaries: Define what you’re comfortable with and establish boundaries that align with your needs and values. Communicate these boundaries to the other person and ensure that they are respected.
3. Take time for self-reflection: Reflect on what you truly want from a relationship and whether the situationship aligns with your long-term goals. Consider whether it’s worth investing more time and emotions into a relationship that may not be able to meet your needs.
4. Be prepared to walk away: If the other person is unwilling to commit or meet your needs, be prepared to walk away. It’s important to prioritize your happiness, even if it means letting go of a relationship that isn’t fulfilling.
Sign #2: You only hang out at home
Another sign that you’re in a situationship is if the majority of your time together is spent at home. While spending quality time at home can be enjoyable and intimate, it can also be a sign that the relationship lacks depth and progression. In a healthy relationship, couples engage in a variety of activities together, exploring new places, trying new things, and creating memories outside of the home. If your interactions are limited to Netflix series and takeout dinners, it’s worth questioning whether you’re in a situationship or a genuine, growing relationship.
You can address this issue by expressing your desire to try new experiences together. Suggest going out for dinner, taking a day trip, or participating in activities that both of you enjoy.
Sign #3: You haven’t met their friends or family
In a committed relationship, meeting each other’s friends and family is a natural progression. It’s a sign that both parties are invested in each other and are willing to blend their lives. However, in a situationship, meeting friends and family is often avoided or delayed. This can be a clear indication that the other person is not interested in taking the relationship to the next level or introducing you to their inner circle. If you’ve been dating for a significant amount of time and have yet to meet any of their loved ones, it’s time to have a conversation about where the relationship is heading.
Sign #4: You don’t make future plans together
One of the defining features of a situationship is the absence of future plans. While casual flings might not require extensive planning, a situationship is meant to bridge the gap between casual dating and a committed relationship. If you find that you’re always living in the present without any discussions or commitments for the future, it’s a sign that the relationship lacks direction. Without a shared picture of the future, it’s difficult to build a solid foundation and work towards common goals. If you’ve expressed your desire for a more serious relationship and your partner is still hesitant to make future plans, it may be time to reassess the situation.
Initiate a conversation about your future goals and aspirations. Share your desires and ask your partner about theirs.
Sign #5: You’re not a priority
In a healthy relationship, both partners prioritize each other’s needs and make each other a priority. However, in a situationship, it’s common to feel like you’re not a priority in the other person’s life. They may cancel plans last minute, prioritize their own needs over yours, or fail to make you feel valued and appreciated. Feeling like you’re not a priority can be emotionally draining and leave you questioning your self-worth.
To address this issue, communicate your feelings and express your desire to be a priority in your partner’s life. You deserve to be with someone who values and prioritizes you.
Sign #6: You avoid talking about the future
One of the defining characteristics of a situationship is the avoidance of conversations about the future. While it’s normal to take things slow in the early stages of dating, avoiding discussions about the future for an extended period can be a red flag. If your partner consistently changes the subject or brushes off conversations about where the relationship is headed, it’s a sign that they may not be interested in a committed relationship. It’s important to have open and honest conversations about your intentions and expectations to avoid wasting your time and emotions on a relationship that may not have a future.
Sign #7: You’re in a cycle of breaking up and getting back together
A common pattern in situationships is the cycle of breaking up and getting back together. This can occur when one or both parties are unsure about their feelings or commitment level. The constant back and forth can be emotionally exhausting and prevent the relationship from progressing. It’s important to reflect on whether the relationship is healthy and fulfilling. It may be time to break the cycle and seek clarity and stability in a more committed relationship. Remember, healthy relations don’t require on and off.
What to do about a situationship
Being in a situationship can be confusing and emotionally draining. Its a complete waste of time and someone always ends up hurt in the end. It’s important to recognize the signs and take action to either define the relationship or move on. By having open and honest conversations, setting boundaries, and prioritizing your own needs, you can navigate the complexities of a situationship and find the clarity and happiness you deserve. Remember, you deserve a relationship that fulfills your needs and brings you joy. Don’t settle for anything less.
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Oh my gosh!!!! This hit the nail on the head!!! A lot of times it can be so confusing on what you are to a person and not everyone is comfortable even finding out that they may mean less to a person than they thought! Then, the idea of yall having a great “vibe” takes over and you don’t want to ruin it by making it awkward and clarifying what you mean to each other. It can be an uneasy conversation, but it’s better to make it known than build a bond off the unknown. GREAT TOPIC THANK YOU SHERO!
Omggg right! That’s why you have to be intentional when you date. Have those conversations up front about what you want. If you know you can’t do the casual thing then don’t do it or else you’ll ALWAYS be the one that ends up hurt.