She Informs

Author: Jada Goggins

  • 10 Important Questions to Discuss Before Moving in Together

    10 Important Questions to Discuss Before Moving in Together

    Moving in together is a big step in any relationship, and it’s important to make sure you are fully prepared. Before taking the plunge, there are certain questions you should be asking each other to ensure that you’re on the same page.

    It is essential to discuss your long-term goals and expectations. Do you both envision this as a temporary living arrangement, or as the first step towards marriage? Understanding each other’s goals will help you avoid potential conflicts down the road.

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    Secondly, finances should be a topic of conversation. Discussing your financial expectations will help set a solid foundation for your shared living expenses. Establishing clear expectations for household responsibilities will also help prevent future disputes.

    These are just a few of the important things you should be discussing before moving in together. By thoroughly discussing these topics, you will set yourselves up for a successful and harmonious living arrangement. So, don’t rush the decision – take the time to address these questions and ensure you’re ready to take this next step in your relationship.

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    The significance of moving in together

    Moving in together is a major milestone in a relationship. It signifies a new level of commitment and can bring you closer as a couple. However, it’s crucial to approach this decision with care and consideration. By asking the right questions and having open, honest conversations, you can ensure that you are making an informed decision that is right for both of you.

    1. Are we ready for this step?

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    The first question you should ask yourselves is whether you are ready to take this step. Moving in together is a big commitment and should not be taken lightly. Take the time to evaluate your relationship and ensure you are both ready to take this next step. Consider factors such as the length of your relationship, your level of compatibility, and your overall emotional readiness.

    2. What are our long-term goals?

    Before moving in together, discussing your long-term goals and expectations is essential. Do you both see this as a temporary living arrangement, or as the first step towards marriage? If you have different long-term goals, it’s good to discuss them openly and honestly and determine if you can find a compromise that works for both of you.

    3. How will we handle finances?

    Finances can be a major source of stress in any relationship. Before moving in together, it’s crucial to have a straightforward discussion about your financial expectations. Will you split all household expenses equally, or will you contribute based on each other’s income? Will you have a joint bank account or keep your finances separate? Establishing clear expectations for household expenses and financial responsibilities will help prevent future disputes.

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    4. How will household chores be divided?

    Living together means sharing household chores, and it’s important to establish a system that works for both of you. Discuss how you will divide the household chores and responsibilities. Who will do what? It’s also important to discuss your expectations for cleanliness. By setting clear expectations from the beginning, you can avoid potential conflicts and ensure a harmonious living environment.

    5. How will we handle conflicts and disagreements?

    No relationship is without disagreements, so it’s always good to have a plan for handling conflicts when they arise. Will you make an intention to always communicate openly and honestly with each other? How will you resolve conflicts and find common ground? Establishing effective communication strategies and conflict-resolution techniques will help you resolve any disagreement that may arise when living together.

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    6. What are our expectations for personal space and alone time?

    Living together means sharing space, but it’s important to respect each other’s need for personal space and alone time. Discuss your expectations for personal freedom and how you will create boundaries within your shared living space. It’s important to find a balance that allows each of you to have the privacy and alone time you need to recharge and maintain your individual identities within the relationship.

    7. How will we handle visits from family and friends?

    When you live together, it’s inevitable that family and friends will want to visit. Discuss how you will handle visits from family and friends. Will you have a guest room or a designated space for guests? How often will you be comfortable hosting guests? Sometimes guests are not always wanted. Make sure to ask if it’s okay if someone comes over. Remember, it’s their space just as it is yours.

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    8. What are our thoughts on marriage and children?

    Moving in together is a step towards building a life together, so it’s important to discuss your thoughts and plans for marriage and children. Are you both on the same page when it comes to these major life milestones? It’s crucial to have open and honest discussions about your expectations for the future and ensure that you are both heading in the same direction. So that no one wastes their time.

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    9. Are we prepared for potential changes in our relationship?

    Moving in together can bring about changes in your relationship dynamic. How you will navigate these changes and ensure that you maintain a healthy and balanced relationship. It’s important to be prepared for the adjustments that come with living together and to approach them with patience, understanding, and a willingness to adapt.

    10. What is our backup plan if things don’t work out?

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    While it’s not pleasant to think about, it’s important to have a backup plan in case things don’t work out. Discuss what will happen if you decide to break up or go your separate ways. It’s important to have a plan for separating your belongings, finding new living arrangements, and moving forward as individuals. Having a backup plan in place can provide peace of mind and help alleviate some of the stress and uncertainty that may come with the decision to move in together.

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    Moving in together is a big step in any relationship, and it’s important to approach it with open communication and a willingness to address important questions. By thoroughly discussing these topics, you will set yourselves up for a successful and pleasant living arrangement. So, don’t rush the decision – take the time to address these questions and ensure you’re ready to take this next step in your relationship.

  • Exploring the Best Techniques for a Good Night’s Sleep

    Exploring the Best Techniques for a Good Night’s Sleep

    Tossing and turning in bed, unable to find that elusive deep sleep? You’re not alone. Achieving a restful night’s sleep can seem like an unattainable goal for many of us. But fear not, because we’re here to unveil the secrets to quality sleep and help you wake up feeling refreshed and rejuvenated.

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    In this article, we will explore the best techniques for a good night’s rest, backed by scientific research and expert recommendations. From establishing a consistent sleep schedule to creating a relaxing bedtime routine, we will get into the practical strategies that can help you unlock the gateway to quality sleep.

    Let’s dive in and create a solid foundation for better sleep tonight.

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    The importance of quality sleep

    Quality sleep is essential for overall well-being. It plays a vital role in maintaining physical and mental health. When we sleep, our bodies undergo a series of rejuvenating processes that repair tissues, consolidate memories, and regulate hormones. Lack of quality sleep can have detrimental effects on our health, leading to increased risk of chronic conditions such as obesity, diabetes, and cardiovascular diseases. It can also impair cognitive function and negatively impact our mood and productivity levels.

    To ensure quality sleep, it’s crucial to understand the factors that influence our sleep patterns. Let’s explore common sleep disorders and how they can disrupt our sleep.

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    Common sleep disorders

    Sleep disorders are prevalent and can significantly impact the quality of our sleep. Some of the most common sleep disorders include insomnia, sleep apnea, restless leg syndrome, and narcolepsy. Insomnia, characterized by difficulty falling or staying asleep, affects millions of people worldwide. Sleep apnea, on the other hand, is a disorder that causes interruptions in breathing during sleep, leading to poor sleep quality and daytime fatigue. Restless leg syndrome is a condition characterized by an irresistible urge to move the legs, often accompanied by uncomfortable sensations. Lastly, narcolepsy is a neurological disorder that causes excessive daytime sleepiness and sudden sleep attacks.

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    Understanding these sleep disorders and seeking appropriate medical help can greatly improve sleep quality and overall well-being. However, even if you don’t suffer from a diagnosed sleep disorder, it’s essential to optimize your sleep environment and establish healthy sleep habits to achieve quality sleep consistently.

    Creating a sleep-friendly environment

    A sleep-friendly environment plays a crucial role in promoting quality sleep. Your bedroom should be a sanctuary, free from distractions and conducive to relaxation. Here are some tips to create a sleep-friendly environment:

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    1. Keep it dark and quiet: Use blackout curtains or an eye mask to block out any light that might disrupt your sleep. Consider using earplugs or a white noise machine to drown out any unwanted noise.

    2. Maintain a comfortable temperature: Keep your bedroom cool, ideally between 60 to 67 degrees Fahrenheit (15 to 19 degrees Celsius). This temperature range is optimal for sleep as it helps regulate the body’s core temperature.

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    3. Invest in a supportive mattress and pillows: A comfortable mattress and pillows that align with your body’s needs can make a significant difference in sleep quality. Choose a mattress and pillows that provide adequate support and comfort for your preferred sleeping position.

    By creating a sleep-friendly environment, you can minimize distractions and maximize your chances of getting a restful night’s sleep.

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    Establishing a bedtime routine

    A bedtime routine is a set of activities that you engage in before sleep to signal to your body that it’s time to wind down. Establishing a consistent bedtime routine can help prepare both your mind and body for sleep. Here are some ideas to incorporate into your routine:

    1. Limit screen time: The blue light emitted by electronic devices can suppress melatonin production and disrupt your sleep. Avoid using electronic devices, such as smartphones and tablets, at least one hour before bedtime.

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    2. Engage in relaxation techniques: Practicing relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing exercises, meditation, or gentle stretching, can help calm your mind and prepare your body for sleep.

    3. Avoid stimulating activities: Engaging in stimulating activities, such as vigorous exercise or intense discussions, close to bedtime can make it harder to fall asleep. Instead, opt for calming activities like reading a book or taking a warm bath.

    Establishing a consistent bedtime routine can signal to your body that it’s time to relax and prepare for sleep, making it easier to fall asleep and stay asleep throughout the night.

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    Sleep hygiene practices

    Sleep hygiene refers to the habits and practices that promote quality sleep. By incorporating good sleep hygiene practices into your daily routine, you can improve your sleep quality and overall well-being. Here are some sleep hygiene practices to consider:

    1. Avoid caffeine and alcohol: Limit your intake of caffeine, especially in the afternoon and evening, as it can interfere with sleep. Similarly, while alcohol may make you feel drowsy initially, it can disrupt your sleep patterns later in the night.

    2. Create a sleep-inducing bedroom: Make your bedroom a sleep-friendly environment by keeping it clean, clutter-free, and comfortable. Use calming scents, such as lavender, and consider using a white noise machine or a fan to create a soothing atmosphere.

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    3. Establish a wind-down routine: Before bed, engage in relaxing activities that help you unwind, such as reading, listening to soft music, or practicing mindfulness.

    By adopting these sleep hygiene practices, you can cultivate a healthier sleep routine and improve the quality of your sleep.

    Natural remedies for better sleep

    If you’re looking for natural remedies to enhance your sleep quality, consider incorporating the following into your routine:

    1. Herbal teas: Certain herbal teas, such as chamomile, valerian root, and lavender, have calming properties that can promote relaxation and better sleep. Enjoy a cup of herbal tea before bedtime to unwind and prepare for sleep.

    2. Aromatherapy: Essential oils like lavender, bergamot, and chamomile can promote relaxation and help you fall asleep faster. Use a diffuser or apply a few drops of essential oil to your pillowcase to enjoy the soothing benefits.

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    3. Melatonin supplements: Melatonin is a hormone that regulates sleep-wake cycles. Taking melatonin supplements can help reset your internal clock and improve sleep quality, especially for those with insomnia or jet lag.

    Natural remedies can complement other sleep strategies and provide additional support in achieving quality sleep. However, it’s important to consult with a healthcare professional before incorporating any new supplements or remedies into your routine.

    The role of exercise in sleep quality

    Regular exercise has numerous health benefits, and improved sleep quality is one of them. Engaging in physical activity can help reduce stress, anxiety, and depression, which are common culprits of sleep disturbances. Exercise also promotes the release of endorphins, which can enhance mood and promote a sense of well-being.

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    However, it’s important to time your exercise routine appropriately. Exercising too close to bedtime can increase alertness and make it harder to fall asleep. Aim to finish your workout at least a few hours before bedtime to give your body enough time to wind down.

    Technology and sleep: Finding the right balance

    In today’s digital age, technology has become an integral part of our lives. However, excessive use of electronic devices, especially before bedtime, can interfere with our sleep quality. The blue light emitted by screens can suppress melatonin production, making it harder to fall asleep.

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    To find the right balance between technology and sleep, consider implementing the following strategies:

    1. Establish a screen curfew: Set a specific time in the evening when you will stop using electronic devices. This will allow your brain to wind down naturally and prepare for sleep.

    2. Use blue light filters: Many smartphones, tablets, and computers have built-in blue light filters or night mode settings. Enable these features to reduce the amount of blue light emitted by your devices.

    3. Create device-free zones: Designate certain areas, such as your bedroom, as device-free zones. This will help create boundaries and minimize the temptation to use screens before bedtime.

    By being mindful of your technology use and creating healthy boundaries, you can minimize the negative impact of electronic devices on your sleep quality.

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    Conclusion: Taking steps towards better sleep

    Quality sleep is not an elusive dream; it’s within your reach. By understanding the importance of quality sleep, identifying and addressing common sleep disorders, and implementing practical strategies, you can unlock the secrets to a good night’s rest.

    From creating a sleep-friendly environment to establishing a bedtime routine and practicing good sleep hygiene, every step you take towards better sleep brings you closer to a healthier, more energized version of yourself.

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    Remember, quality sleep is a cornerstone of overall well-being. By prioritizing your sleep and making it a non-negotiable part of your daily routine, you’ll reap the benefits of improved mood, increased energy levels, and enhanced cognitive function.

    So, embrace the secrets to quality sleep, implement the techniques discussed in this article, and get ready to experience the transformative power of restful slumber. Sweet dreams!

  • The Power of Self-Love: Becoming a Woman of High Value

    The Power of Self-Love: Becoming a Woman of High Value

    Image by Rosy from Bad Homburg / Germany from Pixabay

    In today’s world which constantly tells women they are not good enough, it is essential to embrace the power of self-love and transform yourself into a woman of high value. Self-love is not selfish, but the foundation for a fulfilling and successful life. It is about prioritizing your needs, understanding your worth, and setting healthy boundaries.

    As you embark on this journey of self-discovery and personal growth, it is important to remember that self-love is not a destination, but a lifelong practice. It starts with acknowledging your strengths, celebrating your wins, and forgiving yourself for your flaws. By nurturing a positive relationship with yourself, you can attract healthy relationships and opportunities that align with your true worth.

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    Let’s explore the power of self-love and provide practical tips to help you embrace it fully. From cultivating self-compassion to practicing self-care, we will guide you on the path to becoming a woman of high value. Remember, your journey to self-love is unique to you, so embrace it at your own pace and be patient with yourself. Let’s embark on this transformative journey together!

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    Understanding self-love and its importance

    Self-love is often misunderstood as selfishness, but in reality, it is the foundation for a fulfilling and successful life. It is about recognizing your worth, prioritizing your needs, and setting healthy boundaries. Self-love is not a destination; it is a lifelong practice that requires patience and self-compassion.

    To truly understand the power of self-love, it is important to recognize that it goes beyond superficial acts of self-care. It is about cultivating a deep sense of appreciation and acceptance for who you are, embracing your strengths, and forgiving yourself for your flaws. When you love yourself, you are more likely to attract healthy relationships and opportunities that align with your true worth.

    The benefits of practicing self-love

    Practicing self-love has numerous benefits that extend to all areas of your life. When you love yourself, you become more resilient in the face of challenges, have higher self-esteem, and experience increased overall well-being. Self-love also allows you to establish healthy boundaries, which in turn leads to healthier relationships with others.

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    Furthermore, when you prioritize self-love, you are more likely to engage in self-care activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul. This, in turn, leads to increased energy, improved physical health, and enhanced mental clarity. By taking care of yourself, you are better equipped to navigate the ups and downs of life and achieve your goals.

    Signs of low self-worth and how it affects your life

    Low self-worth can manifest in various ways and significantly impact your life. Some common signs of low self-worth include negative self-talk, constantly seeking validation from others, and comparing yourself to others. When you have low self-worth, you may find it challenging to set boundaries, prioritize your needs, or pursue your dreams.

    The effects of low self-worth can be far-reaching, affecting your relationships, career, and overall happiness. It can lead to toxic relationships, feelings of unworthiness, and a lack of fulfillment. Recognizing these signs and understanding their impact is the first step towards cultivating self-love and transforming your life.

    Steps to cultivate self-love and increase self-worth

    Cultivating self-love requires consistent effort and practice. Here are some practical steps you can take to increase your self-worth and embrace self-love fully:

    1. Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, just as you would a dear friend. Acknowledge your mistakes and flaws without judgment, and offer yourself love and forgiveness.

    2. Identify and challenge negative beliefs: Take a closer look at the negative beliefs you hold about yourself and challenge their validity. Replace them with positive affirmations that reflect your true worth and potential.

    3. Engage in self-care: Prioritize activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul. This could include exercise, meditation, journaling, or engaging in hobbies that bring you joy. Make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine.

    4. Set boundaries: Learn to say no to things that do not align with your values or drain your energy. Establishing boundaries is essential for protecting your mental and emotional well-being.

    5. Celebrate your wins: Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. Recognize your strengths and the progress you have made on your self-love journey.

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    Surrounding yourself with supportive relationships

    Surrounding yourself with supportive relationships is instrumental in cultivating self-love. Seek out friends and loved ones who uplift and encourage you, rather than those who bring you down or undermine your self-worth. Surrounding yourself with positive influences can reinforce your journey towards self-love and provide a supportive network when facing challenges.

    Additionally, consider seeking professional support through therapy or coaching. A trained therapist or coach can provide guidance, tools, and insights to help you navigate any obstacles on your path to self-love.

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    Embracing self-improvement and personal growth

    Self-love is not about stagnation; it is about embracing personal growth and self-improvement. Continuously seek opportunities for learning and self-development. This could involve taking courses, reading books, attending workshops, or seeking out mentors who can help you expand your knowledge and skills.

    Remember, self-improvement is not about fixing yourself but rather about becoming the best version of yourself. Embrace the journey of growth and see it as an opportunity to further enhance your self-love and value.

    Overcoming challenges and setbacks in your self-love journey

    The journey to self-love is not always smooth sailing. There will be challenges and setbacks along the way. It is important to be patient and kind to yourself during these times. Instead of viewing challenges as failures, see them as opportunities for growth and learning.

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    When facing setbacks, remind yourself of your worth and the progress you have made. Surround yourself with a support system that can provide encouragement and guidance. Remember, setbacks do not define you; they are merely stepping stones on your path to becoming a woman of high value.

    Becoming a woman of high value – the transformative power of self-love

    As you fully embrace the power of self-love, that alone you will transform into a woman of high value. You will radiate confidence, attract healthy relationships, and create a life that aligns with your true worth. Embracing self-love is not a one-time accomplishment; it is an ongoing practice that will continue to shape and enrich your life.

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    Remember, you are deserving of love, respect, and all the wonderful experiences life has to offer. Embrace your uniqueness, celebrate your journey, and continue to prioritize self-love. You have the power to transform yourself into a woman of high value, and the world needs your light to shine brightly.

  • Dating with Intention: How to Set Clear Relationship Goals and Find True Happiness

    Dating with Intention: How to Set Clear Relationship Goals and Find True Happiness

    In the ever-evolving world of modern dating, finding a genuine and fulfilling connection can sometimes seem like an impossible feat. With endless swiping, ghosting, and mixed signals, it’s easy to become frustrated and lose sight of what we truly want. But what if there was a way to approach dating with intention, set clear relationship goals, and ultimately find true happiness?

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    In this article, we will explore the concept of dating with intention and how it can transform your love life. Whether you’re looking for a committed partnership, a lifelong soulmate, or simply companionship, setting clear relationship goals can make all the difference. We will dive deep into the steps you can take to define your relationship goals, communicate them effectively, and attract the right kind of partner into your life.

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    By understanding and articulating your desires, values, and non-negotiables, you can create a roadmap that leads you to love and happiness. So, if you’re ready to embark on a journey of self-discovery and intentional dating, join us as we delve into the world of setting clear relationship goals and finding true fulfillment in your love life.

    The benefits of dating with intention

    Dating with intention is the complete opposite of casual dating. When you’re dating intentionally, you’re looking for a certain outcome or end goal. You’re not here to casually waste anyone’s time or go with the flow. Your intentions are genuine and you know exactly what you want. People who date with purpose are often looking for something long-term.

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    Dating with intention offers numerous benefits that can enhance your overall dating experience and increase your chances of finding a compatible partner. When you approach dating with intention, you gain clarity on what you truly want in a relationship. This clarity helps you filter out potential partners who don’t align with your values and goals, saving you time and emotional energy.

    Moreover, dating with intention allows you to prioritize your needs and desires, ensuring that you don’t settle for anything less than what you deserve. It empowers you to establish healthy boundaries and communicate your expectations early on, setting the stage for a more fulfilling and balanced relationship. By being intentional in your dating journey, you can also cultivate a stronger sense of self-awareness and personal growth.

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    Understanding the importance of setting relationship goals

    Setting relationship goals is crucial because it provides a roadmap for your dating journey. When you have clear goals, you can approach dating with purpose and direction, rather than simply going with the flow. Relationship goals help you define the type of connection you’re seeking, whether it’s a long-term commitment, marriage, or something more casual.

    Additionally, setting relationship goals allows you to align your actions and choices with your intentions. It helps you stay focused on what truly matters to you in a relationship, preventing you from getting sidetracked by distractions or settling for less than you deserve. By setting clear goals, you can also evaluate potential partners more objectively, assessing their compatibility based on your relationship criteria.

    This is not to say be stuck up or closed off. But be open to dating people who align with the same things that you want.

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    Common mistakes to avoid in dating

    While dating with intention can be incredibly rewarding, there are common mistakes that many people make along the way. One of the biggest mistakes is not taking the time to reflect on personal desires and values before entering the dating scene. Without this self-awareness, it’s easy to fall into relationships that are not aligned with your actual needs and aspirations.

    Another common mistake is rushing into a relationship without giving it proper consideration. Taking the time to get to know someone on a deeper level before committing can prevent heartache and disappointment down the line. It’s essential to be patient and not settle for a relationship that doesn’t meet your goals and expectations.

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    Identifying your core values and non-negotiables in a relationship

    Before setting relationship goals, it’s essential to identify your core values and non-negotiables. Core values are the fundamental beliefs that guide your life and shape your character. They are deeply ingrained and play a significant role in your relationships. Non-negotiables, on the other hand, are the qualities or traits that you cannot compromise on in a partner.

    To identify your core values and non-negotiables, take the time to reflect on what truly matters to you in a relationship. Think about the qualities you admire in others, as well as the deal-breakers that you simply cannot overlook. Your core values and non-negotiables will serve as the foundation for your relationship goals, guiding you in your search for a compatible partner.

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    Defining your relationship goals

    Once you have defined your relationship goals, it’s time to create a plan to achieve them. Start by breaking down your goals into smaller, actionable steps. For example, if one of your goals is to improve your communication skills in a relationship, you can set a plan to read books on effective communication, attend workshops, or seek the guidance of a relationship coach, etc.

    Additionally, it’s important to set realistic timelines for your goals. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither will your ideal relationship. Give yourself the time and space to grow and learn along the way. Remember, dating with intention is a journey, and the process of achieving your relationship goals is just as important as the end result.

    Finding compatible partners who share your relationship goals

    Once you have clarity on your relationship goals, it becomes easier to attract partners who share the same aspirations. Be open and honest about your intentions when dating, and communicate your goals early on in the relationship. This will help filter out individuals who are not aligned with your vision and attract those who are seeking a similar connection.

    Additionally, it’s important to actively seek out environments and communities where you’re likely to meet like-minded individuals. This could include attending social events, joining interest-based clubs or organizations, or exploring online dating platforms that cater to individuals looking for meaningful relationships. Surrounding yourself with people who share your relationship goals increases your chances of finding a compatible partner.

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    Effective communication in dating and building a strong foundation

    Communication is key in any relationship, and it’s especially important when dating with intention. Be open and honest about your desires, boundaries, and expectations from the beginning. Effective communication allows you and your partner to build a strong foundation based on trust, understanding, and shared goals.

    Listen actively to your partner’s needs and concerns, and strive for open and non-judgmental communication. Be willing to compromise and find common ground, while also respecting each other’s individuality and personal growth. Remember, intentional dating is about finding a partner who supports your goals and aspirations, and effective communication is the cornerstone of a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

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    Nurturing a healthy and fulfilling relationship

    Once you have found a partner who aligns with your relationship goals, it’s important to nurture the relationship and ensure its long-term success. Continuously work on building trust, fostering emotional intimacy, and supporting each other’s personal growth. Keep the lines of communication open and make an effort to create shared experiences and memories.

    Conclusion: Finding true happiness through intentional dating

    Additionally, be mindful of the importance of self-care and maintaining a healthy balance between your relationship and other aspects of your life. Remember that a relationship should enhance your happiness and personal fulfillment, not define it. By nurturing a healthy and fulfilling relationship, you can experience true happiness and find long-lasting love.

  • Boundaries 101: Understanding the Importance of Setting Limits

    Boundaries 101: Understanding the Importance of Setting Limits

    In today’s fast-paced world, maintaining a healthy work-life balance can feel like an unattainable dream. That’s where setting boundaries comes into play. Boundaries defined as limitations are far from the truth. Understanding the importance of setting personal and professional limits is crucial for our mental, emotional, and physical well-being.

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    By setting clear boundaries, we create guidelines for how others can treat us and what we are willing to accept. These boundaries protect our time, energy, and personal space, allowing us to prioritize our own needs without feeling overwhelmed or taken advantage of. In this article, we dive deep into the world of boundaries, exploring their significance in both personal and professional settings. Whether you struggle with saying no to extra work, have difficulty setting aside time for self-care, or find it challenging to specify boundaries with friends and family, this article will provide the guidance and techniques you need to flourish in all areas of your life.

    The importance of setting boundaries

    Boundaries serve as essential markers that define our personal space and mental well-being. They act as a protective shield, preventing others from crossing the line and disturbing our emotional and physical boundaries. Without clear boundaries, we risk becoming overwhelmed, stressed, and drained, which can have serious consequences on our overall health and happiness.

    Setting boundaries is not about being selfish or inflexible; it’s about respecting ourselves and asserting our needs. By setting boundaries, we communicate our limits to others, allowing them to understand what is acceptable and what is not. This empowers us to create a healthy balance between our personal and professional lives, encouraging better relationships and enhancing our overall well-being.

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    Types of boundaries defined – personal and professional

    Boundaries come in various forms, and it’s essential to recognize the different types to effectively execute them in our lives. Personal boundaries refer to the limits we set in our personal relationships, friendships, and interactions with others. These boundaries define our comfort levels, personal values, and the kind of treatment we expect from others.

    On the other hand, professional boundaries are vital for maintaining a healthy work environment and preventing burnout. These boundaries involve setting limits on the amount of work we take on, establishing clear communication pipelines, and defining our availability outside of working hours. By setting professional boundaries, we safeguard our mental and physical well-being, ensuring we have the energy and focus to excel in our careers.

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    Signs of boundary violations

    Recognizing when our boundaries are being disregarded is crucial for maintaining our well-being. Some common signs of boundary violations include feeling overwhelmed, constantly sacrificing personal time for others, experiencing emotional exhaustion, and feeling taken advantage of. These signs serve as red flags that our boundaries are not being respected, and it’s time to take action.

    Boundary violations can happen in various settings, be it personal relationships, friendships, or the workplace. It’s important to pay attention to these signs and address them promptly to prevent further damage to our mental and emotional health.

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    The consequences of not setting boundaries

    Image by Gordon Johnson from Pixabay

    Failing to set boundaries can have severe consequences on our overall well-being. Without clear limits, we risk becoming overwhelmed, stressed and burnt out. Our personal and professional lives start to blend together, leaving little time for self-care and relaxation. This can lead to decreased productivity, strained relationships, and even physical health issues.

    Not setting boundaries can also result in others taking advantage of our time, energy, and resources. This can lead to feelings of resentment, frustration, and a loss of self-esteem. By neglecting to establish boundaries, we allow others to dictate our lives, leaving little room for personal growth and fulfillment.

    How to set personal boundaries

    Here are some practical strategies to establish effective personal boundaries:

    1. Identify your limits and values: Reflect on your values and what is important to you. This will help you establish clear boundaries that align with your beliefs and needs.

    2. Communicate assertively: Clearly communicate your boundaries to others in a calm and assertive manner. Use “I” statements to express your needs and expectations, and be firm in standing your ground.

    3. Practice self-care: Prioritize self-care activities that recharge and rejuvenate you. This sends a signal to others that you value your well-being and need time for yourself.

    Remember, setting personal boundaries is a continuous journey.

    How to set professional boundaries

    In the professional sphere, setting boundaries is crucial for maintaining a healthy work-life balance and preventing burnout. Here are some strategies to help you establish effective professional boundaries:

    1. Define your working hours: Clearly communicate your working hours to colleagues and clients. Set boundaries around when you are available and ensure you have designated time for rest and relaxation.

    2. Delegate and prioritize tasks: Learn to delegate tasks and prioritize your workload effectively. This will prevent you from becoming overwhelmed and help you maintain a manageable workload.

    3. Say no when necessary: It’s okay to say no when you feel overwhelmed or when a request goes beyond your capabilities. Saying no assertively and respectfully is vital for establishing boundaries and preventing overload.

    Remember, setting professional boundaries is essential for your long-term success and well-being. It allows you to excel in your career without sacrificing your personal life.

    Tips for maintaining boundaries

    Maintaining boundaries is an ongoing process that requires consistent effort and self-awareness. Here are some tips to help you maintain your boundaries:

    1. Practice self-awareness: Regularly check in with yourself to consider whether your boundaries are being respected and if any adjustments are needed.

    2. Surround yourself with supportive individuals: Cultivate relationships with people who respect and understand the importance of boundaries. Surrounding yourself with supportive individuals will make it easier to maintain your own boundaries.

    3. Practice self-care: Prioritize self-care activities that help you recharge and replenish your energy. Taking care of yourself allows you to set and maintain boundaries effectively.

    Conclusion and the benefits of setting boundaries

    In conclusion, setting personal and professional boundaries is crucial for our mental, emotional, and physical well-being. By establishing clear limits, we protect ourselves from becoming overwhelmed, stressed, and burnt out. Boundaries empower us to prioritize our needs, establish healthy relationships, and maintain a healthy work-life balance.

    Setting boundaries is not about being selfish or rigid; it’s about respecting ourselves and asserting our needs. Additionally, by communicating our boundaries effectively, we foster better relationships, enhance our overall well-being, and create a more balanced and fulfilling life.

    Unlock the power of boundaries, and start living a life where you are in control of your time, energy, and personal space. Set your boundaries today and experience the profound benefits they bring to all areas of your life. Remember, boundaries are not obstacles; they are foundations for a healthier and happier you.

  • Common Sleeping Myths: Getting a Good Nights Rest

    Common Sleeping Myths: Getting a Good Nights Rest

    Image by WOKANDAPIX from Pixabay

    One thing a lot of people underestimate about the human body is how vital sleep actually is. On our journeys to self-improvement, we must make sure that we are taking sleep into consideration. Here are some common sleeping myths that are indeed true.

    Myth 1: Sleep is the same for both men and women.

    According to the Sleep Foundation, men and women have different circadian rhythms, which can affect the quality of our sleep.

    Circadian rhythms are controlled by our body’s internal clock. This helps regulate the processes and systems our bodies go through, one of those processes being sleep. It helps coordinate those functions at a specific time of day.

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    Women’s circadian rhythm timing tends to go off earlier than men’s. This means women tend to go to bed earlier and wake up earlier than men.

    Myth 3: Sleep shouldn’t be a priority.

    A good sleep schedule helps with emotional well-being, along with your body’s cognitive functioning. With good sleep, you tend to get sick less often, it helps you maintain a healthy weight, reduces stress, and improves your mood. Not getting enough sleep can most likely result in sleep deprivation.

    Sleep Deprivation is a general term for lack of sleep or an inadequate amount or quality of sleep.

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    Myth 2: You can train yourself to get minimal sleep.

    common sleep myths
    Image by Mohamed Hassan from Pixabay

    Not getting adequate sleep every night, even when it becomes routine, can and will result in sleep deprivation. Attempting to train your body to get used to less sleep will result in feeling more stressed, fatigued, and easier to get sick. Since sleep is vital, your body will react as a result of many chronic health problems.

    Routinely getting less sleep can result in weight problems such as obesity, high blood pressure, and many chronic diseases such as cardiovascular disease, heart disease, kidney disease, stroke, and depression just to name a few.

    Myth 4: Naps during the day are a waste of time.

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    Napping during the day happens typically when you don’t get enough sleep during the night. However, it is recommended not to sleep too long so you can get enough sleep through the night.

    Napping during the day helps maintain alertness throughout the day. It is also more sleep, which reduces the risk of disease(s) named above.

    Myth 5: Sleeping with the TV on helps some people sleep better.

    common sleep myths
    Image by Mohamed Hassan from Pixabay

    Studies show that people who sleep with the TV on don’t actually get quality sleep. To get adequate sleep, sleep experts suggest you be in complete darkness, with air flowing, and no sounds present. Sleeping with the TV on or any noise in particular not only affects the quality of sleep you get but it also interrupts your body’s melatonin production.

    Most people who believe they need to sleep with the TV think that it helps when in reality it makes it harder to actually fall asleep, exposing your body to the blue light from electronics. You also have a higher chance of suffering from long-term health issues.

    Related: Bad Habits to Stop Doing to Improve Your Life

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    For the average adult, the recommended amount of sleep is at least 7-9 hours. Now we know that that is not always possible due to busy and demanding schedules. Additionally, your age also plays a factor in how many hours of sleep you need a night. But of course the more, the better.

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    Myth 7: The time of day we sleep doesn’t matter.

    Your body shuts down between the hours of 3am-5 am, also called the “dead zone”. However, when we get sleep between the hours of 10pm-2am, our body recovers the most. You tend to get more adequate rest and wake up more refreshed. The earlier you go to sleep, the easier it is to wake up earlier.

    In conclusion, it is safe to say that getting enough sleep should be a part of our daily self-care routines, along with working out and eating right. Not only for our mental health but for physical health as well.

  • Facts About Postpartum Depression in Women

    Facts About Postpartum Depression in Women

    It’s a known fact that one in seven women are affected by Postpartum Depression every day. The most important thing is to not make any assumptions and to seek medication. There is a cure for PPD, but it is also important to talk it out.

    What is Postpartum Depression?

    Postpartum Depression, also known as PPD, is a long-lasting emotional distress, typically after childbirth or during pregnancy. Pregnancy comes with many unpleasant side effects, such as nausea, anxiety, and the most common side effect, cravings. It is statistically a very well-known disorder because one in seven new moms depict signs of PPD.

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    Postpartum affects mostly women who were unprepared for pregnancy, women who did not want the pregnancy, and those who were to some extent hopeless during the birth period. It is one of the many ‘baby blues’ – baby blues being the effects of childbirth. PPD is a real disorder that needs medication and if not treated, can last for years.

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    Postpartum Depression Symptoms

    The most common signs of depression are; anxiety, sadness, isolation, laziness, and a negative attitude toward people. PPD, however, has very unique and severe symptoms. Its major symptoms include:

    postpartum depression

    Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay

    • Intense and prolonged crying
    • Hopelessness and a deep lack of motivation
    • Withdrawal from your newborn or thoughts of hurting your baby or spouse
    • Insomnia and laziness at all times (inability to do tasks that were easily done before the pregnancy)
    • Lack of appetite or eating a lot at times
    • Overthinking and absent-mindedness – forgetfulness at times too
    • Hallucinations and loss of confidence
    • Suicidal thoughts or thoughts of hurting yourself
    • Slowed decision-making and loss of concentration
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    What causes Postpartum Depression?

    • Pre-pregnancy anxiety or depression
    • Pregnancy strains due to changes that come with the newborn
    • Increased baby chores like; feeding, cleaning, and putting the child to sleep, especially for first-time moms
    • Any family issues that were experienced during or after the pregnancy, e.g., the death of a family member or someone close to the family, and marital fights
    • Financial constraints on either of the spouses’ sides
    • Giving birth to a disabled baby
    • Family history of anxiety disorder
    • Abandonment by family or partner
    • Complications during pregnancy
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    Prevention and Control of PPD

    There is no known prevention method for PPD. Celibacy and avoiding pregnancy may be the only way of preventing PPD, but this is a very far-fetched way of preventing it. Hence the assumption that there is no known way of preventing PPD disorder. There are, however, numerous ways of controlling PPD, such as:
    Talking it out: A problem half-shared is a problem half-solved. If you believe that you have emotional distress, find people with whom you can share it like friends, family, and professional psychiatrists.
    Exercise: Take time out of your day to exercise. There are numerous ways to exercise, like; yoga, running, hitting the gym, and meditation. Through exercising, your mind is set free from negative thoughts that may have caused PPD, and exercising helps you keep fit too.

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    House Assistance    : House chores can be tiring, especially after childbirth. These tasks can be delegated to professional house managers or family friends; this helps reduce hopelessness or any other negative feelings toward babies.
    Plan your life: Failing to plan is planning to fail. It is advisable to plan how you handle your daily tasks, either by keeping a diary or a notebook. Write down all the things you need to do on each particular day. This reduces the likelihood of absentmindedness and speeds decision-making.
    Support Groups: Finding support groups is an effective way of controlling PPD. Talking to other people who may have gone through PPD disorder helps with your recovery journey. Being around people who are as vulnerable as you also increases your confidence.

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    Unknown Facts About PPD

    It’s two-sided: Men’s mental health has been completely ignored in society. Men are believed to have supernatural emotional strength. This is, however, not the case; even male parents go through PPD. A newborn changes the lives of the female mom and her male counterpart. Men have trouble adjusting, especially financially, and this may trigger emotional distress, suicidal thoughts, and abandoning their wives and babies, among other side effects of PPD.
    It affects the growth of an infant: 0 to 5 years is considered the critical age for a child. Trauma or anything negative that happens to an infant between zero and five years old ends up ruining the rest of his or her life. Infants need to be handled with care, any lack of care from the parent’s side, like PPD disorder, may affect the child later on in his or her life.

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    If symptoms persist, medication is required for all PPD patients. Recovery is possible, but only through the proper channels. According to CNN, the first drugs for PPD were approved for use. Drug makers Sage Therapeutics and Biogen have discovered a drug named Zuranolone under the brand name Zurzuvae, which is expected to launch late in 2023. Therapy was the only known way of controlling PPD, and Zuranolone could go a long way towards fastening the recovery process of PPD. It has been recently approved in the US and is therefore not available in other continents that probably need it most.
    We hope, however, that through patient access programs, access will be available soon in third-world countries. Antidepressant drugs can help too, PPD is a form of depression like any other, and thus patients can be prescribed antidepressants.

  • 6 Factors For Cultivating a Healthy Friendship

    6 Factors For Cultivating a Healthy Friendship

    Image by Eira from Pixabay

    A healthy friendship is that one part of life that most people take for granted. This not only applies to friendships, but relationships in general. When you start to looking at friends you meet long-term, it is easy to know whether or not that person will be around for long.

    The same way you approach dating for potential life-long partners. You should also look potential life-long friendships in the same instance.

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    Safe Spaces

    It’s essential that you create a space for your circle to feel vulnerable. A judge-free zone is the core to a healthy friendship. Making someone comfortable to share themselves with you no matter what is creating a safe space. Safe spaces are important because they open the opportunity to share and express oneself without the fear or being ridiculed or judged.

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    Accountability

    Being able to hold each other accountable no matter how they may feel, is critical for a genuine, adult friendship. According to Investopedia, accountability is the acceptance of responsibility for one’s own actions. Being able to hold someone to their actions, whether right or wrong. That’s when you know when there is respect in the friendship…when there is ample room for accountability.

    Support

    One thing I’ve learned is not being there for someone when they need you can very hurtful. Whether you realize it or not…support is something we as humans need. Let your friend know that they have your full support, and ACTUALLY be supportive. Lift them up, be that shoulder to cry on, let them share their feelings with you. Support is being there for one another whenever they need you, through the good and bad.

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    Trust

    I think it’s safe to say that this goes for any relationship. Without trust, you don’t have a foundation to build on. To be able to depend on your friend to be honest, to be yourself around, you can share your dreams, thoughts and secrets without feeling judged.

    Now, of course trust is something that has to be built. Communication, honesty, and time builds trust for a lasting, healthy friendship. I can’t imagine a healthy friendship without trust.

    Love

    Love one another. Cherish one another. Care for them, and want the best for them. Love is such a strong feeling for a person, and of course, you have compassionate love and romantic love. For a platonic, healthy friendship to be genuine, there must be compassion.

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    Discernment

    Being able to discern genuine friends from those that aren’t so genuine. Discernment is the ability to judge well. A core process in weeding the good from the bad. Unfortunately, people come with ulterior motives or some people just weren’t raised to be good people. Its up to you to decide whether a person is a good friend to have around or someone who may put you in an uncomfortable situation.

  • Top Woman-Dominated Career Fields

    Top Woman-Dominated Career Fields

    Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

    From school to the workforce, it’s important that in this male-dominating world, women have their own fields to dominate. While men are running the country and making the decisions (not for long), believe it or not, some fields are mostly saturated by women. I’ve included the fields along with the percentages of women, compared to men for each career.

    I would argue that another reason why there is such a huge pay gap and why men get paid more is because of the gender roles placed on society. Being as though the men have to be the ones to take care of the household financially of course. It has become a crisis in this day in age as women are becoming more independent, and more households are splitting financial responsibility in half.

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    They’ve come up with a name for these jobs, identified as “pink-collar” jobs. Pink-collar jobs are jobs that a saturated with women and usually pay less. This is why men usually don’t go for these types of jobs.

    Of course, healthcare was a shadow of a doubt the industry that was filled with occupations that were mostly woman-dominated careers.

    Healthcare

    • Registered Nurse – 86%
    • Nurse Practitioner – 86.9%
    • OBGYN – About 85%
    • Maternity Nurse – 90.4%
    • Dental Hygienist – 97.1%
    • Dental Assistant – 96%
    • Doula – 94.3%
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    According to Harvard Business Review, researchers have found that the pay gap is not as simple as women being pushed into lower-paying jobs. In effect, it is the other way around: Certain jobs pay less because women take them. 

    Social Work

    • Social Worker – 90%
    • Public Health Nurse – 92.5%
    • Case Manager – 76.6%
    • Children & Family Therapist – 80.8%
    • Child Welfare Worker – 78.7%
    • Foster Care Social Worker – 79%

    Psychology

    • Licensed Clinical Therapist – About 70.4%
    • Clinical Psychology – 64.8%
    • Psychology Professor – 61.6%
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    Childcare/Education

    • Teacher – About 71%
    • Babysitter – 94%
    • Child Development Aid
    • Early-Childhood Teacher (Pre-school & Kindergarten) – 97.6%

    Marketing

    • Event Planner – 77.6%
    • Social Media Manager – 61.1%

    Administrative Jobs

    • Administrative Assistant – 94%
    • Secretary – 94%
    • Receptionist – 91.6%
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    Cosmetologist/Estheticians

    • Hairstylist – Over 90%
    • Skin Specialist – 85.5%
    • Make-up Artist – 93%
    • Nail Technician – 96%

    Hospitality & Tourism

    • Wedding Planner – 93%
    • Travel Agent – 78.1%
    • Caterer – 61.3%
    • Hotel Concierge – 60.7%
    • Cleaning Jobs – 85%

    Human Resources

    • HR Manager – 76%
    • Talent Management – 61.3%
    • Compensation & Employee Benefits – 63.4%
    • Training & Development – 58.5%
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  • 11 Common Trauma Responses Among Women

    11 Common Trauma Responses Among Women

    Image by Mary Pahlke from Pixabay

    We’ve all been through trauma and it affects everyone very differently. Trauma stems from childhood to adulthood experiences but it is important that we learn to heal from them. I’ve listed a few common trauma responses that we may think are normal but are stress reactions, stemming from trauma.

    Studies show that women with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), and substance abuse disorders have more frequently experienced rape or witnessed a killing or injury; men with both disorders typically witnessed a killing or injury or were the victim of sudden injury or accident (Cottler, Nishith, & Compton, 2001).

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    Some people react to trauma with PTSD, while others might show mild responses that are not quite large enough to be diagnosed.

    Now, just because you may suffer from these things does not automatically mean you suffer from trauma, these are just some common behaviors as a result of a traumatic experience.

    DISCLAIMER: I am not a trained mental health counselor or a licensed therapist.

    • Self-medication
    • Irregular sleep schedule
    • Excessive alcohol use
    • Difficulty expressing oneself
    • Racing thoughts
    • Memory Problems
    • Numbness and attachment
    • Hyper-independence
    • Loss of purpose
    • Argumentative behavior
    • Self-Harm
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    Self-Medication

    Self-medication is one of the most widespread trauma responses in today’s society. According to VeryWellMind.com, self-medication is a way to cope with specific types of emotional pain in the absence of a more adequate solution and the lack of social relationships. Almost the same idea as “comfort food”. When you’re in such a negative mental state, some people want to escape it as soon as possible. Some people choose food, and some self-medicate for the temporary feeling.

    Irregular Sleep Schedule

    Staying up really late or not being able to get any sleep at all is also one of the very common trauma responses. According to Sleep Foundation, individuals with PTSD frequently have trouble falling asleep and awakening easily, or even waking up many times throughout the night. Numerous people with PTSD also have nightmares. These issues result in disrupted, non-refreshing sleep.

    Excessive Alcohol Use

    Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

    Along with self-medication, Alcohol use is another substance abuse tactic people use to avoid dealing with difficult emotions associated with traumatic experiences. While it is only temporary, it also helps individuals avoid the pain their feeling for the time being.

    Difficulty Expressing Oneself

    Everything eventually results back to childhood trauma. Women who have experienced trauma end up having difficulty openly communicating. This can be caused by not wanting to relive the same outcome or feel the same way it felt when previously expressing how they once felt. They normally have a negative connotation when it comes to expressing how they feel.

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    Intrusive Thoughts

    Constantly thinking about the traumatic event over and over again, is classified as flashbacks. It can increase heart rate and cause anxiety. Sometimes when people experience intrusive thoughts, it is so intense they feel like they’re reliving the trauma again.

    Memory Problems

    Having trouble remembering important things or trying to avoid the traumatic event, can result in more permanent memory problems. When you try your best not to remember certain things, it becomes a habit. One of the common trauma responses that people don’t realize they suffer from.

    Numbness and Attachment

    Traumatic stress tends to evoke two emotional extremes: feeling either too much (overwhelmed) or too little (numb) emotion. Numbness is the process of detaching from feelings, thoughts, and emotions. Which normally results in difficulty forming attachments or relationships with people.

    Hyper-Independence

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    Hyper-independence is a stress response when you want to take care of everything on your own without the help of others. This could derive from being let down consistently or never having anyone there to help in the first place. So it may be hard to accept help, or you may feel you’re not worthy of any help.

    Loss of Purpose

    After trauma, a lot of women lose a sense of purpose. You normally find it when you are going through a healing journey. Versus when you go through trauma, you tend to lose your purpose or sense of self. You lose yourself, and when the trauma passes you don’t recognize yourself anymore.

    Argumentative Behavior

    Individuals who may be suffering from PTSD, tend to form more aggressive behaviors. A lot of irritability and angry outbursts tend to occur.

    Self-Harm

    Self-harm is any type of intentionally self-inflicted harm, regardless of the severity of the injury or whether suicide is intended. Often, self-harm is an attempt to cope with emotional or physical distress that seems overwhelming or to cope with a deep sense of dissociation or being trapped, helpless, and “damaged”. (Herman, 1997; Santa Mina & Gallop, 1998).

    What I recommend if you are suffering from any of these things is therapy. There are plenty of affordable and free resources if you cannot afford therapy, but I believe it is the most significant thing you can do for your own mental health and healing. Thanks for reading!

  • Toxic Relationship Habits People Think Are Normal

    Toxic Relationship Habits People Think Are Normal

    Image by mohamed_hassan from Pixabay

    Sometimes we enter relationships and have bad toxic habits that we think are normal when they’re not. Habits that are more than likely normalized by the new generations. I’m here to tell you about them and why they are unhealthy. I am guilty of some of these habits so we’re learning better habits together. Which is all the personal growth journey is about.

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    Table of contents

    1) Blowing someone’s cell phone up

    It can be easy to get caught up in your emotions when you’re upset or sad, or when you want to talk to someone. Constantly calling and texting someone when you want to speak to them and they’re not answering is inappropriate. If they don’t answer the phone the first time, give them time to return the call. It shows a lack of respect and boundaries. Unless something is wrong and it’s an emergency, then the person might really have a life and is busy. On top of all that, it can come off a bit crazy.

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    2) Calling them out of their name

    Your partner calling you out of your name is one of the biggest signs of disrespect. Vulgarity in general shouldn’t be used to get a point across. It’s disrespectful and is completely out of line. If it’s not your name, a term of endearment, or a puppy name then it should not fly.

    3) Blocking/Unblocking

    The entire point of blocking someone is so that the person has no way to contact you. Intentionally blocking someone to make them upset is childlike behavior. Blocking and unblocking someone is not a healthy way to communicate when issues arise. If anything, it always makes the situation worse. If you really need to block someone, please do it logically and keep them blocked.

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    4) Bringing out the worst in you

    When you start doing things you wouldn’t normally do, it’s not a healthy situation. Let’s use revenge cheating as an example. If you’re the type of person who is totally against cheating, and you find yourself cheating just to get back at your partner. next thing you know, you’ve backtracked on your morals. This leads me to my next toxic relationship habit…

    5) Cheating

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    We all know that cheating is one of the most terrible acts you can commit, and there isn’t much left that needs to be said about it. Cheating will not only destroy the relationship, but it also destroys trust, character, self-esteem, and sense of self-worth. It shows lack of morals and self-control.

    6) Gaslighting

    According to Psychology Today, gaslighting is a form of manipulation and psychological control. Victims of gaslighting are deliberately and systematically fed false information that leads them to question what they know to be true, often about themselves. When someone is doing this to you, nine times out of ten, they won’t change. Leave.

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    7) No respect for boundaries

    When you have rules set for yourself and your partner does not respect your limitations or violates them then they simply do not care. You most likely won’t agree on a lot of things, which makes it hard to work with. Don’t ignore the signs. They will also not take you seriously, because you don’t even take your boundaries seriously.

    8) Not Defining the Relationship

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    Don’t ever settle. Once you’ve made it clear you know what you want, stand on it. When someone is hesitant about what their plans are with you, then that should be loud and clear. They may want something, just not with you. Situationships are a complete waste of time and energy and someone always gets hurt in the end.

    The only way for a situationship to work out successfully is if both parties agree on it and are aware of what it may come with. If someone is okay with “going with the flow”, there are normally other parts of their lives they have also been “going with the flow” with. There are no clear intentions with you or their life.

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    9) Inconsistency

    If someone is in and out of your life, take that as a sign, and leave them alone. Someone who has genuine intentions and concern for you and your feelings will provide clarity without confusion. It is up to you to decide whether to deal with the inconsistency or not.

    10) Ghosting during difficult times

    toxic relationship habits
    Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

    Ghosting someone is one of the most spineless and inconsiderate things you can do. If they don’t care enough to communicate with you, they are a coward. Everyone knows that communication is the key to a healthy relationship. It is immature to leave someone hanging, period. Never take someone ghosting you personally. It has everything to do with how they handle situations, and nothing to do with you.

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    11) Policing One’s Character

    For instance, your boyfriend telling you “Please don’t do ABC, my friends don’t like it when you do that.” is policing your character and is controlling. Controlling what your partner does (or wears), is one toxic habit most people don’t even believe is manipulating.

    12) Entitlement

    Entitlement is the belief that one is deserving of certain privileges and/or benefits without having to earn them. People who feel entitled tend to lack self-awareness, lack of empathy, a sense of victimhood, or a lack of understanding of privilege; and all of these things are toxic.

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    13) Not communicating one’s feelings

    This is something so many people have a hard time with. Once you open yourself up you may be scared that you’ll be taken advantage of when the truth is, that only happens with the wrong people. With the right person, communication goes a long way. Vulnerability is a characteristic that a true leader carries. Once you’ve mastered it, it’ll take you far. So many things could be fixed with a simple conversation.

  • Why Complaining is Such A Bad Habit?

    Why Complaining is Such A Bad Habit?

    Image by Mariana Anatoneag from Pixabay

    Did you know that when you complain, it automatically alters your brain for negativity, which blocks other elements like creativity and productivity? Sometimes it’s good to ask yourself, where do I play a part in my own happiness in my circumstances? I like to reason that complaining is not completely avoidable…but if you have the time to sit around and complain, then you can make the time to do something to change your situation as well.

    Why Do We Complain?

    Most people would argue that we complain when we are unsatisfied with something at the moment in our lives, but there are many definitions of complaining. To express dissatisfaction, annoyance, feelings of pain, or resentment. To express grief, discontent, displeasure, or to grumble. According to Habits for Wellbeing, in his book Complaint Free World, Will Bowen shares five reasons why we complain.

    1. To get attention
    2. Remove responsibility
    3. Inspire Envy
    4. Power
    5. Excuse poor performance

    When you read these reasons, do you see now how this causes a problem?

    Why Complaining is Unhealthy

    Being a chronic complainer is toxic to the brain. Again, not saying complaining is completely unavoidable, but cutting back on it and replacing it with gratitude can help the brain produce positive reinforcement instead of negativity. What you feed your brain is what it settles for. If you complain all the time, you’re more likely to be unhappy and negative. The time you spend complaining could be geared toward other productive things like finding solutions to the things that leave you unsatisfied. We relate complaining to negativity, which again kills productivity and creativity.

    What To Do With a Chronic Complainer

    Being in the company of a chronic complainer is toxic. It’s easy to absorb these types of people and behaviors. But instead of absorbing, try offering solutions. Set boundaries-let them know you’re open to talking and listening but will not engage in the repetitive dialogue that they are constantly trying to have. Encourage them to express gratitude instead.

    Thanks for reading!

  • Scholarships & Grants for Single Mothers

    Scholarships & Grants for Single Mothers

    With inflation, rising living costs, and many more unmanageable things going on in the world. School can be very costly for just about anyone, especially single mothers. Being a mother is more than a full-time job, it’s a 24/7 job. Taking care of a child, working, and trying to pay bills are tough. Even not having the funds to start a business you’re passionate about can be super challenging. Here are a few scholarships and grants for the single mothers out there who are looking to improve their possibilities.

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    $10,000 Scholarships4Moms

    A $10,000 scholarship giveaway for single moms. This one is super easy and includes a one-step process:

    1. Filling out the form on the homepage

    Simple!

    Single Mother Grants

    SingleMotherGrants.org has grants for rent, utility bills, child care, education, medication, housing, medical bills, mortgage, and other things as well. They have over 1,000 grants for single moms to apply for. They also have a FB page for you to join, where they post tips and hack for all moms out there who may need them.

    LouEllen Dabbs Scholarship

    This specific scholarship is for single parents interested in furthering their careers in banking, finance, and business. The requirements include:

    1. Must be enrolled in school for business administration or banking
    2. Must be a single parent
    3. Must have a minimum of 9 credits
    4. Must have at least a GPA of 2.35

    The Life of a Single Mom Ministries

    The Life of Single Mom Ministries is a nonprofit organization that has an extensive list of resources for single mothers. They assist in things like emergency services, such as housing, education awards, utility bill payment assistance, or other financial services. Providing life skill education in 3 core areas: Parenting, Finances, and Health & Wellness, along with life-changing events, such as single mom conferences, boot camps, and more. Life of Single Mom Ministries believes that no single mom should walk alone.

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    College Grants for Single Mothers

    StudentGrants.org has a list of grants if you want to further your education in any degree. They range from three important places for available grants: the federal government, your state, and local governments, and private businesses and non-profit organizations. They correspondingly suggest you watch out for scams because there are plenty of websites that will scam you out of thousands of dollars.

    Supermom Scholarship

    The $2,000 Supermom Scholarship is designed to help undergraduate and graduate single mothers and those who have been directly impacted by one, on their path to obtaining a college degree. To apply, you must tell about your experience as a single mother and/or as the child of a single mother. After all, being a supermom is one of the most important jobs in the world.

    Asherah Foundation Scholarship Program

    Scholarship winners receive $2,500 annually to be applied toward expenses pertaining to a four-year college degree, associate degree, accredited vocational program, or other postsecondary career training program. Despite the seemingly long list of qualifications, the impact will be worth it. To qualify, you must:

    • Identify as a woman.
    • Be at least 24 years of age at the time of application.
    • Be committed to the pursuit of postsecondary education and/or training.
    • Demonstrate a financial inability to attain further education/training without the Scholarship.
    • Demonstrate personal discipline and perseverance.
    • Provide a high school transcript, a current transcript from the current school, or other documentation of educational progress.
    • Complete Foundation’s current essay requirement.
    • Provide two letters of recommendation and two references with contact information.
    • Have been accepted into an accredited college or university degree program or a vocational or training institution.
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    The Patsy Takemoto Mink Education Foundation

    This foundation offers five scholarships every year to women who are at least 17 years old and are mothers with minor children. Wanting to pursue an associate’s degree, bachelor’s degree, or a vocational degree or certificate, and have an annual family income of $28,000 or less (depending on the number of family members). Awards are up to $5,000. Read the website for qualifications.

    Rosenfeld Injury Lawyers Single Mother Scholarship

    The Rosenfeld Injury Lawyers LLC’ offers an Annual Single Mother Scholarship to open doors for single mothers and their children.

    Rosenfeld Injury Lawyers LLC will review applications and award 2 applicants with a $1,000 scholarship each. This scholarship may be used to cover school-related expenses, such as tuition fees, registration costs, supplies, and books. Read their website to understand the requirements and the application process.

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    Osher Reentry Scholarships

    The Osher Reentry scholarship, from the Bernard Osher Foundation, offers scholarship support for students who have experienced a cumulative gap in their education of five or more years; are at the undergraduate level and pursuing their first baccalaureate degree; anticipate workforce participation for a significant period of time after graduation; demonstrate financial need; and show academic promise and a commitment to obtaining their degree. Requirements include:

    Application Requirements

    • Application form required
    • Transcript required
    • Financial need analysis required

    Custody X Change Single Parent Scholarship

    The Custody X Change Giving Fund awards three scholarships to single parents each year. To apply, you must be a full-time student at an accredited college or university within or outside of the U.S. and have the equivalent of a 3.0 GPA or higher. One of the requirements for the application process includes a 400-500 word essay question that asks, “How will you use your education to improve your family?”

    Thanks for reading!

  • 19 Harsh Truths About Life

    19 Harsh Truths About Life

    These harsh truths about life might ruffle some feathers, but they must be said. Once you hit a certain age and have experienced some things you realize more and more that life is a continuous learning lesson. Some things you can control and some you can’t.

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    Table of contents

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    1. No matter what you do, not everyone will like you.

    You could be one of the sweetest, nicest, or most loving people in the world. There will be people that are not so fond of you and you will not be able to regulate that. It could stem from jealousy or insecurity, either way, it is something you cannot 100% avoid.

    2. Attractive people do get the better end of the stick.

    Unfortunately, looks do matter whether we like it or not. We live in a judgmental, and shallow society, that places attractive people on a pedestal. The better you look, the better you’re treated, the more you are respected, and the more opportunities you receive.

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    3. Love comes when you least expect it. Not when you go looking for it.

    It will come into your life and you may be ready for it or you may not if you’re ready, good. If you’re not ready, you’ll get prepared for the right person. Trust the process. True love is beautiful.

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    4. Consuming alcohol and drugs harms you more than it helps you.

    Two of the most toxic habits we can participate in. Yes, drinking can be fun! Doing drugs pumps adrenaline. Both even might make you feel better temporarily, but depending on them can make you stagnant, and lazy, and even harm you physically. When done excessively, both can take years from your life. If you can cut back on them, good. If you can cut them out of your life, even better!

    Read: Toxic Habits to Stop for A Better Life

    5. If you don’t heal from your childhood, it will affect most of your adult relationships.

    We have been taught or have seen things that we need to grow out of or unlearn. If not done so early on, it can be very hard to escape. After all, the first step is acknowledging the things you need to unlearn.

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    6. Money doesn’t buy happiness, but it does improve your quality of life.

    Many people believe the more money you make, the happier you will be. This could be true for some people, as money can solve most of our problems. However, money is never the root cause of happiness. Which comes from within.

    7. Ignoring the red flags in a person the first few times around is self-sabotage.

    This goes for friends, potential partners, and families. When people show you who they are believe them. It’s hard to change things you don’t like about someone when that is who they truly are. You’re only hurting yourself when you choose to stick around.

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    8. The people you choose to keep in your circle are very important.


    Unfortunately, birds of a feather do flock together. The people you associate with are the same people you tend to pick habits from. If you’re not growing with each other, learning from each other, and helping each other elevate–then you do not need them around. You should always be around people who are in the position you want to be in or you’d like to learn from.

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    9. Women are sexualized way too early on.

    From an early age, women are judged based on their bodies and sexualized based on how developed they are at a very young age. There are weird men out there and horny teenage boys. No matter how innocent she is, there will be boys trying to convince her not to be. Unless she is kept in a cage, there is no way to avoid this.

    10. Sex without love is meaningless.

    Maturing is realizing sex without a connection is pointless and not the reward we think it is. Emotional security before sex is what makes it special and rewarding to your mind, body, and soul altogether. Stop punishing your body.

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    11. If you let someone borrow money, never expect it back.

    If they had the money, they would have never asked to borrow it in the first place. Some people will pay you the money back but is it rare they do. And if you do get the money back that person truly just didn’t have it at that moment.

    12. Expectations lead to nothing but disappointments.

    When you expect things and they don’t happen, you tend to become disappointed. If you didn’t expect anything in the first place, then disappointment simply wouldn’t happen.

    13. The biggest lesson about becoming an adult is unlearning all the BS you were taught as a child.

    The older you get the more you begin to alter your one views and decisions. Which are sometimes different than what you were taught coming up.

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    14. Death is going to happen, we just don’t know when.

    Death is inevitable, it will come and we can’t avoid it. We just hope it comes later than we expect.

    15. Just because you have been friends with a person for a long time, does not mean you have to stay friends.

    People outgrow one another and that is perfectly fine. However, hanging on to someone because of the length or history serves no purpose. Think of the current state of the relationship and what purpose it truly serves in your current life.

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    16. You can do everything right and still lose.

    Some things will not always work out the way you expect them to, but that doesn’t mean you didn’t do the right thing.

    17. Don’t rely on or expect closure.

    Relying on closure is waiting for permission from someone to finally move on. Don’t wait on it, ask for it, or expect it…just begin the moving-on process. Learn to accept things for what they are.

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    18. If you don’t respect yourself, people will see it.

    If you don’t respect yourself, it will be clear as day and people will treat you as such. Begin to value yourself and others will as well.

    19. If you hurt someone, they will remember it forever.

    We tend to never forget our bullies from grade school, the person who broke our hearts the most, or friends/families that betray us. We can most certainly forgive, but we rarely ever forget.

    Thanks for reading! Comment some of your harsh truths below!

  • What is Life Like After Graduating High School?

    What is Life Like After Graduating High School?

    Image by elizabethaferry from Pixabay

    After graduating high school, I knew that I was going to college and I knew exactly what college I was going to. I had a plan set for myself, but things change.

    Here are some takeaways I’ve learned after graduating high school:

    1. You Get Total Authority Over Your Own Life.

    After you turn 18 you begin making your own decisions. Your life is now in your hands whichever way you choose to take is completely in your hands.

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    2. The Real Responsibilities Start Rolling In.

    You’ll begin putting things in your name if you don’t have them already. You’ll begin paying bills whether it’s as little as a credit card bill or as big as a car note, this is when you start.

    3. Constantly Figuring Out Your Next Step.

    after graduating high school
    Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

    After high school, and for most of your adult life. There will be a continuous cycle of ‘what is the next step for me?’ You won’t always have a game plan lined up because things change and it may feel like you don’t have it all together but in actuality, as much as s may seem, no one does and that’s completely normal.

    4. Tackling Life’s Hurdles The Best Way You Know How and Getting Better At It As You Go.

    It may seem like the world is constantly against you, but it’s not. There will be hard times that don’t seem fair or may seem too tough to handle but I’m here to tell you, there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. Hard times build character and some of the strongest people. Basically, the older you get, the better you get at tackling these tough situations.

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    5. Everyone Will Give Their Two Cents.

    Everyone will give their opinions on what they think you should do or which direction you should take with your life. Only you know what’s best for you. The best advice I ever received was to never listen to someone who is not where you want to be in life. If you wouldn’t trade places with them then you shouldn’t listen to them. I stopped listening to everyone and followed my heart. I stopped listening to everyone and started searching for people who were in positions I wanted to be in.

    6. Real-life Situations Could Lead To Anxiety and/or Depression

    Not everyone is able to handle things in the same way, and not everyone is strong. Being an adult in the real world can be stressful and can really get the best of you. After graduating high school, you enter the workforce, discover love and go through heartbreak, financial stress, family and friends, and many other things. Too much at once can be hard to handle and can take a toll on your mental health. Always make it a priority to take care of your mental health.

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    7. You’ll Grow in Ways You’d Never Imagine

    Afterward, you begin to discover your true self, the things you like and the things you don’t like. You outgrow things, bad habits, and even people…its life. People might say you’ve changed, but you’ll save you’ve grown. I can truly say I’m a totally different person than I was when I was in high school. 18-year-old me would be so proud.

    8. You’ll Always Feel The Need to Find Ways to Make Money

    You’ll be taking care of yourself and maybe even others as well, which means you’ll need to be financially independent. Most people are fortunate enough to be able to stay with their parents after high school. Which is the smartest thing to do while stacking your money. You’ll learn about the economy and inflation because you’ll be affected by it. You’ll learn that two incomes are better than one.

    9. There’s Really No Time For Lollygagging

    That time period of just graduating high school is like a breath of fresh air. Eventually, all you really want to do is relax. That should really be the time period where you begin getting your sh*t together. Yeah, you’re still young but the earlier you start, the earlier you will take off.

    Thank you for reading!